7 Things to do After a Mommy Meltdown

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The Mommy Meltdown

I was having a day.

My car got stuck in the snow, and the neighbor had to dig me out.

The house was a wreck, my kids were acting wild.

I was so emotionally drained.

I just wanted to sit down for a little while before I started dinner.

When I heard a CRASH! from my living room.

I ran into the room to see what happened.

My mind was racing, one of my kids was hurt or someone fell into the Christmas tree.

I turn the corner to see my 5-year-old daughter staring at our fireplace, with one of my giant glass Christmas Ornaments shattered across the glass and carpet.

She looked shocked and terrified.

I lost it. A pure Mommy Meltdown. I yelled at that little girl.

"Why on earth would you throw that!?"

"You made a huge mess!"

"Get out of the living room. I will clean it up later."

And a stormed (yes with stomping footsteps) to my room.

I had a full-on tantrum right in front of my daughter.

I made her feel terrible. I instantly felt a pang of regret in my stomach.

How on earth could I speak to her like that?

Here are 7 things I have found to help me calm down after I have had a Mommy Meltdown.

TAKE A BREAK

Step away and take a breather. Do not let this moment crush you. Take a moment for yourself, sit in the bathroom, or cook dinner to help you get your mind right.

NOTICE

Do your best to notice why you were feeling so frustrated and overwhelmed with your child. What was it that they asked too many questions? Did they break something? Are they complaining about doing their homework?

Realize what it is that made you so angry, and see that it is not such a big deal.

IS THIS A YOU PROBLEM?

Was this something that was caused by you? Did you have a bad day? Are there too many sounds going on around you? Are you just feeling overwhelmed and needing a moment to lash out?

Pay attention to your emotions, and notice if this is what is causing you to feel so overwhelmed with your child.

TAKE NOTE

Now that you know what caused you to be so angry, write it down or talk it out. Explain why you were so upset and what you can do to fix it.

Verbalizing or writing about it will help you remove any frustration you may still be holding onto.

EXPLAIN YOURSELF

After you have thought through it, speak to your child.

This should be a simple talk, not a lengthy conversation. Speak to them on their level (consider their age) about what just happened.

Explaining ourselves will allow our child to see our perspective, and why we were feeling the way we did.

I told my 5-year-old daughter that "I was having a hard day, and when she threw the Christmas ornament it frightened me, I thought she was hurt."

I explained that "I should have told you that throwing the ornament would make it break. These ornaments are glass, which means that they are fragile."

APOLOGIZE

If you were wrong or out of line, say so. Our kids need to know that we mess up too. They need to know that we value them enough to admit that we were wrong. Apologizing will show them to own up to responsibility, and that everyone makes mistakes.

As I finished the conversation with my daughter, I added; "I am sorry that I scared you. It wasn't nice of me to yell. Will you forgive me?"

An apology to a child should be sincere and occasional. You should not be screaming and apologizing day in and out. That shows that there is a deeper issue going on.

ACCEPT AND MOVE ON

Do not dwell on this moment. Don't beat yourself up because you yelled at your child after they made a mistake. Once you have apologized or spoken to your child, move on. Learn from the experience and do your best not to do it again.

WE ARE ALL HUMAN

I think we often forget how many new emotions and experiences our children are going through. We forget that they are still human. Just like us.

They are still figuring this world out. Our kids are still working toward controlling their bodies, using proper manners, and being good people.

They are trying their best, just like you are.

When you have a mommy meltdown, just remember, neither of you is perfect.

For our children, we need to be mindful of our behavior and do the very best we can.